Crimson Snow
by MarieAmethyst
Summary: Yamato is rejected, and chooses the final course...Warning: Suicide, Character Death.


Author: MarieAmethyst  
Title: Crimson Snow  
Rating: R  
Warnings: Suicide, Character Death, Angst  
Disclaimer: I don't own them. I just play with them. Lyrics by Linkin Park.  
Author's Note: Depression sucks. Enough said.  
  
~*~  
  
I hit you and you hit me back  
We fall to the floor/The rest of the day stands still  
Fine line between this and that  
When things go wrong I pretend the past isn't realm  
Now I'm trapped in the this memory  
And I'm left in the wake of the mistake/Slow to react  
Even though you're so close to me  
You'll still so distant/And I can't bring you back  
  
~*~  
  
"You…you freak!"  
  
"Taichi-"  
  
"How could you say that?! You disgusting pervert! I don't want your sickening feelings!"  
  
We were standing only feet apart, yet the distance between us was an endless gulf, slowly drowning in the dark waters rising to swallow me up with its fierce possession. The trees in the secluded forest stared down at me mockingly, silently laughing. Because I had dared to admit my feelings to Taichi, my best friend. My heart.  
  
Now, gazing into those cold depths filled with loathing, I wondered how I could have ever thought Taichi might, just might, return my love. Wrong. Again.  
  
"Taichi," I whispered, pleading, not sure what to say anymore.  
  
He closed his eyes and shuddered, "Don't say my name! Don't even talk to me!"  
  
I reached out with a shaking hand. When he felt the touch on his arm his eyes shot open, staring into mine in horror. I snatched my hand back, but the damage was done.  
  
The first punch caught me by surprise, and I felt the chill of the snow at my back. None of that compared to the tearing happening inside my heart.  
  
The second blow I was able to deflect and the third I blocked with an upraised arm. Blood tickled down from my nose to mingle with the tears beginning to spill, but that wasn't what held my attention. Taichi was standing at my feet, fists clenched so hard they shook. Tears dripped unknowingly from brown eyes.  
  
"I don't want your love, Yamato," he said quietly, "I don't want to ever speak to you again."  
  
He turned and walked away, his words slicing me in two. Alone.  
  
I could have lain there, gazing up at the bleak sky, watching the snowflakes fall about me and on me, for hours. I wasn't sure, I no longer cared. I had nothing left to live for.   
  
In detached emotions, I felt the frozen tears on my face, but I didn't reach up to brush them away. Why bother with such a useless emotion when my world just shattered.  
  
I lost the only one I lived for. It was like the setting of the sun. Except the sun wouldn't rise ever again.   
  
Numbness in my body was beginning to catch up with the numbness in my heart. Slowly, I pushed myself up.   
  
And made up my mind.  
  
Pulling the pocket knife that I kept in my back pocket out, I flipped it open until the sharp edge gleamed in the pale light. On the gray surface I could see myself reflected, blond hair, blue eyes. Lost eyes.  
  
I pulled my jacket off, letting the chill bite at my skin. Rolling back my sleeves to my elbows, I picked the knife back up and held it against my right wrist. And pressed down.  
  
Pain slashed up my arm, but I ignored it. It wasn't as excruciating as the pain inside. With detacted emotions I watched the red drops flow down my hand to land on the snow, turning it a crimson color. Switching the knife to my right, I quickly brought it up to my left and repeated the motion.   
  
For a moment I sat there, feeling the life flow out. I knew soon I have eternal peace. Briefly I thought of TK, and felt some remorse. But my brother had many friends, he would get over my death and have a wonderful life. Not too many would mourn for me.  
  
Finally I didn't have the strength to remain upright, and fell slowly back against the cold cradle of snow. Breathing was harder. Soon.  
  
Then to my amazement, an angel appeared before me. Had I died so quickly then?  
  
"Yamato," the angel whispered, and dimly I realized he wasn't an angel at all.  
  
"Taichi," I managed between suddenly stiff lips.  
  
"My God, what have you done?" he said softly, staring in horror at the blood still issuing from my wrists.  
  
"Don't want to…live without you, Taichi," I whispered, squinting when the boy kneeling beside me blurred.   
  
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Taichi whispered, bending down to press his forehead against mine. Maybe he was aware my vision was fading fast.  
  
Wetness dripped onto my face. "You're crying."  
  
Taichi nodded, "Please don't die, Yamato. Please." He repeated it over, a catch in his voice.  
  
Was this the same Taichi that only awhile before had told me he never wanted to see me again? "Too…late."  
  
He rose to peer down at me, "No it's not! We can get you to a hospital, to a doctor-"  
  
I slowly shook my head, feeling the loss of control of my body growing stronger, "No…time…now."  
  
"God Yamato, don't die on me!"  
  
I managed a weak smile for his sake. "Be…well…my…friend. My…heart."  
  
I let my eyes slide close, my breaths becoming shallow. The desperate words said above me had no meaning, just a buzzing in my ears. I thought I felt a brush against my lips, but perhaps it was just my imagination.   
  
With one last sigh of breath, I let go of the cold world. And left the body lying in crimson snow.  



End file.
